Update

Things have changed a bit since Grandpa passed away in November. There isn't as much for me to do around the house. It's quieter and the temperature is a bit more stable. However, I miss him very much and so does Grandma. I feel that she has aged quite a bit since the funeral. She has been sick for awhile now and doesn't seem to be getting better. (Granted the air quality is horrible.)

When I am driving to work, there have been two songs that make me cry and I have a hard time listening too. But I thought I would share them because they are really good songs.

The first one is a Carrie Underwood song: Temporary Home

The other song is Brad Paisley: When I Get Where I'm Going

When I get where I'm going
on the far side of the sky.
The first thing that I'm gonna do
Is spread my wings and fly.

I'm gonna land beside a lion,
and run my fingers through his mane.
Or I might find out what it's like
To ride a drop of rain

(Chorus:)
Yeah when I get where I'm going,
there'll be only happy tears.
I will shed the sins and struggles,
I have carried all these years.
And I'll leave my heart wide open,
I will love and have no fear.
Yeah when I get where I'm going,
Don't cry for me down here.
I'm gonna walk with my grandaddy,
and he'll match me step for step,
and I'll tell him how I missed him,
every minute since he left.
Then I'll hug his neck.

(Chorus)

So much pain and so much darkness,
in this world we stumble through.
All these questions, I can't answer,
so much work to do.

But when I get where I'm going,
and I see my Maker's face.
I'll stand forever in the light,
of His amazing grace.
Yeah when I get where I'm going,
Oh, when I get where I'm going,
there'll be only happy tears.
Hallelujah!
I will love and have no fear.
When I get where I'm going.
Yeah when I get where I'm going.Little boy, 6 years old
A little too used to bein' alone.
Another new mom and dad,another school,
Another house that'll never be home.
When people ask him how he likes this place...
He looks up and says, with a smile upon his face,

"This is my temporary home
It's not where I belong.
Windows and rooms that I'm passin' through.
This is just a stop, on the way to where I'm going.
I'm not afraid because I know this is my
Temporary Home."

Young mom on her own.
She needs a little help, got nowhere to go.
She's lookin' for a job, lookin' for a way out,
Because a half-way house will never be a home.
At night she whispers to her baby girl,
"Someday we'll find our place here in this world."

"This is our temporary home.
It's not where we belong.
Windows and rooms that we're passin' through.
This is just a stop, on the way to where we're going.
I'm not afraid because I know this is our
Temporary Home."
Old man, hospital bed,
The room is filled with people he loves.
And he whispers don't cry for me,
I'll see you all someday.
He looks up and says, "I can see God's face."

"This is my temporary Home
It's not where I belong.
Windows and rooms that I'm passin' through.
This was just a stop,on the way to where I'm going.
I'm not afraid because I know... this was
My temporary home."

This is our temporary home.

You're a Good Man Charlie Brown

Thursday, November 18th 2010 was Grandpa Brown's viewing. It was amazing to see how many people came to pay their respects to their family member, friend, co-worker and teacher. Grandpa truly touched many people's lives. 

Friday, November 19th 2010 was Grandpa's funeral. There was another viewing at 11:00 AM and again I was amazed by all the people. Sadly, not everyone got to see him. We had a family prayer and then we said our "final" goodbyes before they closed the coffin. (That was the hardest part.) Then we had the funeral at 12. It was a beautiful ceremony. Then we headed to the graveyard. (The next hardest part.) 

Here are a few pictures of me and Grandpa. 

"A Grandpa is someone you never outgrow your need for." -Unknown

Holding his first Grandchild

Temple Square

Taking me on some rides at Hershey Park

Grandpa has a picture napping with each of his Grandchildren :)

My 15th Birthday

My 16th Birthday

At our wedding

I love and miss you Grandpa. We'll be together again someday.

Hospital Update

Grandpa - still in the hospital and will be for while. He is at Pioneer Valley Hospital in the ICU. He is currently sedated and intabated. (I don't think that's spelt right, but I can't spell!) He was breathing very well on his own and actually had CO2 poisoning. He also has a sever infection in his lungs. As of day, his labs are looking better and his lungs sound better.  We take it one day at a time and are here for each other as a family.

Grandma - is having a really hard time with all of this. She doesn't like going and seeing him and when we are there she doesn't stay long. She is worrying about everything little thing at home to keep her mind off of what is wrong, which is driving me nuts, but I know she needs me. She also is forgetting a lot more because she is so worried. (I don't think she has cried yet.)

Please keep them in your prayers and thoughts. I will try better to keep this blog updated for everyone.

Paramedics

Grandpa hasn't been doing very good since Sunday. He is much more confused and much less mobile. He hasn't been eating and all he wants to do is sleep. His oxygen levels are very low causing everything to get worse. Today he had an appointment to check his heart. But when it was time to go, he couldn't get out of the chair. We couldn't get him out either. He was too weak and weighs too much for me, Grandma or Maria to get him up. He tried one last time to get up and was almost all the way up and decided he was too weak, so he fell to his knees. We lied him down and I called 911. The emergency crew came and took him to Pioneer Valley Hospital. We aren't sure yet when he will be home.

Is my face blue?

Because I feel like I am talking till I'm blue in the face and no one is listening. I talk to Grandpa and he either forgets or ignores me. So I put up notes and he ignores them too. I suggested to put in hard wood floor to make it easier for Grandpa to get around. And nothing was done. Now he complains that it's hard for him to push the walker on the carpet. I suggested that we find a senior center for Grandpa to go to during the day for scheduled activities and to socialize with others his age. And all I got was that's a good idea we'll look into it. Now his sleeping schedule is completely turned around. I have now asked for help either from family or bringing in a nurse because it is getting to much for me and Grandma. Honestly he needs to go back to the home, but no one wants that. However they aren't here everyday. He keeps Grandma up all night and has started waking up us. He sleep all morning. He has tripled in size. He is always sick to his stomach. He needs more and more help doing everyday things. And he has gotten really mean. If something isn't done, I won't be able to do this anymore and will have to move out. Then what will happen?

Autumn!

I have been loving my Grandparents yard! It is so full of color and textures! I thought I take some pictures and share them.

ENJOY! :)

This vine type plant is so pretty! It's my favorite!!!

The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly

The Good:

Grandpa made lunch the other day.

The Bad:

He made lunch because Grandma fell and didn't feel well.

The Ugly:

I don't want this blog to sound like I am complaining or being negative, but not every story is a "this will be funny later". In reality, Grandpa is getting worse. He doesn't want to get out of his chair. He doesn't want to do anything for himself. And everyday things are getting very hard for him. He has also started to forget people's names and dates of events.

Just to warn my family members, not all of my posts are going to be happy and "funny". And I may post something that you think isn't "appropriate". But I am doing this so that the family knows exactly what is going on.